Honesty and frankness are to marriage what honesty and integrity are to business, your presence ensures success, your absence leads to bankruptcy.
Here are 4 important steps to forgive the spouse who was unfaithful:
Why forgive? Because you need and deserve to be happy again. Forgiveness will give you a new path, now if your spouse is going to be by your side or not, you are the one who needs to decide, however, the biggest responsibility you have right now is to heal yourself.
One important piece of advice you should not forget is to live in the present. The past needs to stay where you are, whether you have been happy or unhappy, it does not matter anymore.
Learn to live the moment, forgiveness is in the present and not in the past, because changes both in you and in the spouse must be meaningful and sincere. The past takes away what needs to go, the present brings the changes that accurately occur.
Betrayal is among the worst evils that hurt, hurt, tear, and kill love in the home. Families are destroyed by this act of cowardice. The wound of betrayal tends to be painful and deep.
However, wounds were made to uncured and healed, leaving them open and unattended tends to cause more pain and suffering, and this can not continue to happen because the betrayed person has already suffered too much and deserves to be cured and happy with or without the spouse.
This is a decision that should be submitted to the betrothed spouse to take, so it is necessary, on the part of that person, the courage to decide to heal and also decide whether or not the spouse remains in their life.
It may be very difficult to speak of love when the betrayal has caused so much sadness and much pain, however, love is necessary, especially now, where the betrayal made what was before a little piece of heaven, a great hell.
Love is the cure! Loving when the spouse least deserves may be one of the greatest challenges of truly loving because it will require the betrayed person to be resilient in order not to give up on marriage.
The betrayed person will have to make the decision to evaluate the partner’s strengths and weaknesses, not with resentment and anger, but with three types of love: self-love, love for the spouse, and love for the family. Even if the traitor has not weighed this down before practicing the act (because if he did, he would never have betrayed him), yet the injured person must do so, and whatever decision he has made will surely have been his best decision.
4. Correct Perspective
The correct perspective will locate the problems, the depth of them and, if possible, overcome them. Regrettably, in some specific cases divorce is the saddest, but the most correct decision to make.
Having a correct perspective is the great step to overcome a betrayal and also to forgive the spouse because it will involve reason and emotion. However, this search must be done with people prepared to assist the spouse who committed the act and the other person who has suffered the action.
Seeking help from family, friends, and religion is of great value and all are welcome. However, it is important to remember that betrayal causes emotional and mental illnesses such as depression, so it is essential to seek help from professionals who are specialized, such as therapists, psychologists, and psychiatrists.