The secret of an effective communication in marriage lies primarily in applying the principle entrenched in this verse from the Bible: “And just as you want men to do to you, you also do to them likewise” (Luke 6:31).
The question, then, is what would you like others to do unto you. Now we can rephrase the question as “what would you like your spouse to do to you?” Then, do that thing to your spouse. The answer to this basic question would go a long way in improving communications amongst couples. Communication doesn’t have to be verbal alone. Though verbal communication is very important, non- verbal communication can go a long way in rediscovering the sparks in your marriage.
Here are examples of what you want your spouse to do unto you.
1. Adjust to your likes and dislikes
2. Express appreciation for favours done
3. Praise you for your achievements
4. Forgive you for your failures
5. Pay attention when you talk
6. Not hold you accountable for your behaviour
7. Let you set your own rules
8. Provide money to spend as you wish
9. Tell you the truth
10. Maintain a neat house
Now having read some of the things that you wish your spouse can do for you, the question is “can you do those things for your spouse?” Outside the verbal communications that many people believe in, the act of non-verbal communication goes a long way in establishing a marriage life that is founded on mutual understanding even without saying a word.
So, stop the complaints about your spouse and start walking on the road to effective communication in your marriage. Note that it doesn’t come with just reading this post and saying “oh, that is a good post,” it takes practical steps to actualise that effective communication in your marriage.